Dear Mr FEAR,
This is like a Dear John letter Mr Fear because I want to break up with you. I had ENOUGH!
Are you surprised? Well, too bad!
I know, I know…we’ve been together for so long…
I can’t take it anymore. You keep on trying to stop me from fulfilling on my dreams, from being the free spirit that I am, constantly questioning myself, feeling emotionally, mentally aaaaaand physically paralysed every time I want to do something new or wondering if I am loved or if I am pretty enough…or successful enough…or…or…or…
Why now? Well, let me tell you what broke the camel’s back:
When my conditioning coach Mack Newton asked me to write an article, I was excited at first, even proud, as I felt so privileged to be asked by him to say a few words. He is THE conditioning coach to the super athletes, to champions and he wants ME? to write an article for his newsletter. WOW! Yey! Happy dance!…….
And then YOU turned up… and panic kicked in. Aaaaaarrrrggghhh! How can I measure up to someone like Mack who inspires so many? How can I write about anything that might make sense or even have a contribution to someone? I am just a small fish in this massive ocean called The World. Right? Oh hang on…Am I small fish, or am I NOT!?
Far out! I am so confused right now. What to do? What to do?
Who can I blame as this doesn’t feel so good? I got it! I blame YOU, yes YOU Mr Fear! I started to wonder why do I always come back to you? Who are you? I tell you who you are! You are this yukky, unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain or harm.
But today it dawned on me, where is the threat of danger, pain or harm? From Mack? Or those that will read the article? Who is going to do that to me? No-one!…… except ME. I AM the one that let you into my world and I AM the one that allowed you to take over my life.
It made me question, where did you come? I tell YOU where and when!
You came from the past, the past where my life was in continuous, daily fear of abuse, emotional & physical pain and the danger of what is coming next – and not knowing how to deal with it or protect myself from it. It was so ingrained that I lived it into my entire life.
But you know what? Sitting down and writing the article for Mack is when I had a big AHA and realised that life is not all doom and gloom! Despite the past, I am here! I am alive and safe! I am fabulous, I am happy, I am pretty, I am successful, and I am the opposite of you…I am LOVE.
And today, right now, in this moment, I want to acknowledge you Mr Fear! I am writing this article and I am so proud of myself! Mr Fear, thank you for being in my life, because if you weren’t I wouldn’t have been as relentless and persistent as I am. I wouldn’t have achieved what I have achieved, wouldn’t have travelled the world to continuously develop myself even at the expense of great emotional pain and turmoil but great freedom and transformation. I will not let you rule me anymore because I know that when one resists, the issue persists!
So, Mr Fear, I actually don’t want to break up with you…I was just kidding! I welcome you into my life because if you are not in it, I do not exist anymore. You keep me on my toes, keep me uncomfortable and are continually pushing me towards creating those huge dreams that I will achieve, no matter what. And when you creep up on me on a daily basis, I will look you in the eyes and do what I have to do to achieve those dreams, whether I like the feelings you create or not.
Because I am relentless, I live with integrity and my desire for love, connection and contribution is stronger than my fear!
All my Love!